Late Night Jokes for February 2, 2015

  • The song “This Is How We Do It” turned 20 years old this week.  And now we know that the “IT” Montell Jordan was singing about was a blueprint for making a one-hit wonder.
  • A new all female Ghostbusters sequel has been cast. The plot follows four female Ghostbusters that have to take on the supernatural, when one of their fellow busters suddenly has to go on maternity leave.
  • Health officials have declared electronic cigarettes a health threat for California, and they are seeking statewide regulations. Similarly, the same health officials declared that just breathing in California is also a health threat.
  • Eugene de Kock, a death squad leader for the former apartheid state of South Africa, has been granted parole after two decades in jail.  In order to protect his safety in the public, he will be changing his name to Eugene de Murderer on Parole.
  • Strangers in Detroit raised $60,000 to buy a car for a man who walks to work 21 miles a day.  In other news, over the weekend, a bank in Detroit was robbed of $60,000.
  • NFL network has fired Warren Sapp after he was arrested in Phoenix for soliciting sex from a prostitute.  Arizona law forbids anyone from soliciting sex without verifying the prostitute’s green card.
  • Rapper Suge Knight has been charged with murder after a hit and run in Compton.  Knight claimed he didn’t murder anyone, he was just doing hands-on research for his next album.
  • Strippers in Oregon are lobbying for better work conditions.  They’re demanding that stripper poles be cleaned from once to twice per year.
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